St. Louis Photographer » A Journal by Holly McCaig

My friend, Tammy, inspired me to do a Flashback Friday. I’ve been meaning to share more creative things here, but I’ve got my mind deep into a project that is sucking the life out of me. Outside of my new book purchase, I am probably going to bed early tonight. Well, who am I kidding? I’ll probably watch tv until I fall asleep.

Anyway, because it’s too much work to come up with a new and creative post today, I am flashing back. A year ago, I was out in Phoenix with my friend, Audra, shooting a wedding with her. My very first full catholic mass wedding conducted in half English and half Spanish. Phew! But, the mariachi band made it complete. On the ride home that night, we would learn that Andrea’s mom passed away from a heart attack. A shock to us all. I felt so helpless, hundreds of miles away from our family. My brother brought Andrea into our lives several years before and her family was cherished by us.

It’s amazing how much things change in a year, and it’s amazing how fast a year goes. Just a reflection:

It was after this wedding, and during Phyllis funeral, that I started my own “funeral list” – things I wanted to happen at my funeral. A mariachi band shall be hired to come play. Some day, I’ll share the rest of my list.

Rest in Peace, Phyllis.

Today would be her 31st birthday. I will celebrate her beautiful 16 years of life and how silly and gorgeous she was. She is really missed. If you’ve never heard her story, you can read it here. But, let’s not be sad. Let’s be happy that she was so vibrant in life.

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We celebrated our family Christmas last night and it was nice. Except for eating WAY too much, I think we all had a great time. Santa brought me the ever so cool Fuji Instax Mini – now to load up on tons of extra film. I have so many plans for this camera with the studio! Some pictures from yesterday:

For those seeing images of my dogs in crazy “get-ups” no fear. They don’t stay on very long. Unless it’s a sweater to keep them warm when it’s cold outside.

That’s Jake & Andrea’s gianormous dog, Pirate.

OMG – best dessert ever. Chocolate Truffle Mouse Cake. Yah, I said that.

Poor Andrea was sick.

The camera – and some funny pictures. 10 film packs go fast!

My brother’s beer – gotta love Schlafly! Too bad we didn’t have any Christmas Ale.

This afternoon we are heading out to St. Charles to my uncle’s home. The extended family will be together. This year, we opted to do no gift giving except to the little ones. I’m so glad for this. It helps keep the focus on family and enjoying company rather than feeling pressured to buy gifts for so many people. I like keeping things simple.

Merry Christmas.

I’m going to take a moment to get a little bit sappy. For my mama! Yes, I call her mama. I spent most of my childhood life growing up in the south – so that term is kind of a southern ‘thang I guess.

Today is my mama’s birthday! I can’t tell you how much I love this woman! She’s been through more than any woman should ever have to endure. Fighting along side my dad as he battled his life with cancer. Losing him and all the while dealing with the troubles we had with my sister. She forged forward through so many things to continue working to support my brother, who let’s not forget, was born late in her life. Here she thought she was done raising small children. She gave him all she could. She fought a long hard fight when my sister was murdered. She uprooted her life and moved back to Missouri to be near her family.

I’m sure these were not her plans. I’m sure they weren’t her dreams as a young child, nor a young woman that fell in love with my dad at college (SEMO to be exact).

Life is a constant struggle and every day I see how she fights to continue with a job that is not a dream, but a necessity. She deserves more. It’s why I work so hard to build my business so I can take care of her. Just like she has taken care of us. When life hands her lemons, she doesn’t always make lemonade. She gets frustrated. She should. It’s time things go her way. She deserves it. But, my birthday wish for her is to keep holding on to the hope that things are going to be more amazing. Our lives are all so much more amazing because of her.

So, if you don’t mind…leave her a little birthday love here on the blog. My mama is the best ever. I love you, ya silly pirate hooker!  (that’s a little joke)

P.S. The above photo is EXACTLY my mom! She will break out into laughter and none of us will ever know what she’s laughing at. Then, when we ask her, she laughs harder. She can’t even tell us. When we finally find out, it’s not much of anything. Oh, her sense of humor is one of a kind. HA!

Well, I survived the big Cooter, Missouri Thanksgiving festivities. The land of little technology and simple thinking. Two days is about all I can handle before I go slightly insane about not having a real connection with the world.

Technically, I’m not back in the office until Tuesday. It’s so important as a business owner to dedicate your days off. I know that will be hard to stick to this spring and summer, but I gotta do what I gotta do to keep some sanity. So, I close Sunday and Mondays. At least I try.

Tomorrow, we’re taking our family Christmas picture. In the past they have been quite fun. Last year’s was fun. We “Lollipopped” ourselves and wore some cute shirts from Old Navy. This year, well, now we’re going to wonder how to top this one – next year. It’s pretty good. Just you wait and see.

In the meantime, mah little Jack-bab-eee came up to the studio to help model some lighting setups for me. I heart him. Until he pees on the sofa. Sigh.